a disgrace to my gender?

I'm All For Girl Power!
I’m All For Girl Power!

I know that by posting something like this I am prone to open myself up for attack, but I am genuinely interested in hearing the ‘other side’ of my argument on this subject.

I don’t understand women-only groups.

I am quite loud online (I hate the word ‘prolific’ – I just think of myself as being noisy), I have met quite a lot of people in various circles.  Although I suffer from chronic shyness (ARGH! STRANGER DANGER!!), I have found that a swift couple of vodkas and a huge deep breath (and probably a little too much laughing) gets me through these initial meetings, and I then really enjoy myself, and love meeting such a wide variety of people.

Due to me spending so much time online, and often meeting people in ‘real’ life, I seem to be invited along to quite a lot of stuff.

Today is a case in point.  I received four email invites today.  One for a local group, one for a blogging group and two for general networking / ‘thought platform’ (??) opportunities.

And each one of these four was for a women-only group.  So, I wont be going to any of them.

I like women, I think they’re great.  I do think that in certain areas they seem to be over-shadowed by men or not taken quite as seriously, but I honestly believe that women-only groups in these situations serve not to empower women, but to prove that they ARE different to men.  They highlight the differences rather than proving the similarities.

I’m not saying that there should be no women-only groups at all – I can understand groups where women want to talk / act freely, especially for religious or cultural reasons, but for example one of the group meetings I was invited to today is supposedly to give women a stronger voice in media roles and has many ‘prolific’ women speakers.

Surely women already think that they need a stronger voice, so you’re kind of preaching to the converted.  Wouldn’t it be better all round if all of those women were just meeting with a group of people working within the media (apparently including bloggers I’m guessing, otherwise I have no idea why I was invited!) whether they are male or female?

If there is some kind of re-education about gender equality needed, then why aren’t the men being included in this?

Perhaps I am completely missing the point, but then I have never even seen the point of ‘girls nights in/out’ either.  As far as I’m concerned, if I fancy a party, I want to ask my friends along.  that may turn out to be all girls just due to circumstance, but I have never felt the need to seclude them from proceedings.

Come on – I would love it if someone could really tell me why I am so very very wrong on this matter.  I am totally for girl power (I’m in no way an anti-feminist) – but I’m all for boy power as well – if they’ve got what it takes!


6 thoughts on “a disgrace to my gender?

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  1. I totally agree – if I happen to end up with a group of pals or a work situation where they are all women, that’s great but for me I don’t actually seek this or particularly ‘notice’ I do realise that for some – religious restraints, personal issues etc women only groups maybe necessary but I personally – although I’ve been quite seriously abused by a couple of men (but not all!) don’t think that the way forward in society is to have women or men only groups, I enjoy men and women’s company equally – people are people and somehow it rings of whites only or blacks only – and I find the divisions unnecessary and exactly that, divisive – nice blog – thank you

    1. Thanks for the comment. It’s actually quite nice to hear that at least someone agrees with me, when you hear from so many of these groups, you kind of think that all other women must think the same way and that you are obviously so so so wrong 😀

  2. I absolutely agree with you. It seems to me that I learn more when I am in mixed gender groups, I would also extend your arguement to apply to groups of mixed ages. As much as I love to spend time with my few small groups of women friends my own age (it is wonderful to share age & family concerns as well as freely laugh at yourself), mixed gender and mixed age groups are always more invigorating.

  3. Totally with you on this – hate anything that smacks of any group being excluded on age / gender / religious / sexuality whatever grounds. I was invited to join a reading group that would focus only on Women’s Literature ie only female literary authors rather than chick lit. Can’t think of anything worse.

    1. It’s almost like reverse sexism, isn’t it?

      As I said, I can understand that women often DON’T receive equality, and I am all for the fight to make this happen – but I don’t feel that a group of women excluding all male input is the way to go about it!

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