the demon drink


My elderly (21 years old) cat has been a very poorly puss this week – in fact I even ended up working from home on Monday because I was so worried that she wouldn’t last the day and that The Girl would come home to find her dead.

She’s way better now btw…but this has hardly any relevance to this post 🙂

On Tuesday was my work Christmas lunch, and so it was one of the few chances that our disparate employees manage to get together and go out.  Hence I was in the pub when The Girl called me at about 4.45

The Girl:  I just wanted to ring and let you know that Suki had some water – which I thought was really good news
Me:  it is – it’s brilliant news.  Does she look any better?
The Girl:  just a little bit.  She still wont let me touch her though.
Me:  well, she’s old and obviously in a bit of pain, and feeling sorry for herself – give her time hunny.
The Girl:  Mmmm.  *pause*  Where ARE you?
Me:  In the pub
TG:  Why are you in the pub?
Me:  because it’s good
TG:  I don’t think thast it’s good
Me:  Why not?
TG:  well, you might drink lager, or wine…
Me:  or vodka?
TG:  yes – or vodka…and start behaving inappropriately
Me *absolutely pissing myself*:  You are worried that I’m going to be inappropriate?!
TG:  yes
Me:  Have you ever seen me be inappropriate?
TG:  No
Me:  Do you know what acting inappropriately looks like?
TG:  No
Me:  well, don’t worry your pretty little head darling – I am totally appropriate!

Of course, when I got off the phone to her, I started dancing on the bar and whipped my knickers off.

(The last bit might be a lie)


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