what i waste my energy doing

The Girl has been a pain in the arse over recent months…well, perhaps over the past year.  When people ask “What has she done wrong?”, I am often at a loss to explain.

However, as she seems to be absolutely oblivious to what she does wrong, I came up tonight with the idea of spending a week recording her behaviour for her to read back when she’s in a better mood, so that she can see exactly what she does.

Before anyone says it, I KNOW that she’s (probably) just acting liek a teenager, but I can hand on heart say this is NOT how *I* used to act as a teenager – and she’s 12, not even a teenager yet!

Anyway, she was out at drama club tonight, which she loves, and didn’t get home til about 7.40 – she came straight in to have dinner, so this list is from 8pm when she finished dinner til 10pm when she was meant to have been in bed for half an hour.

• Pulled all clothes out of wardrobe and left them on the floor whilst changing
• Argued and complained about having a shower
• Pretended to shower whilst not actually getting in it
• Spent over 50 minutes in the bathroom once in the shower
• Complained about having to tidy room
• Read a book after being told to tidy room
• Read another book when first book was taken away whilst still not tidying room
• Pretended to brush teeth and shouted about not being believed, until it was pointed out that her toothbrush was still bone dry
• Slammed bathroom door twice and bedroom door once
• Claimed that room wasn’t tidy as thought had only been asked to ‘put away clothes’ so left everything else on the floor
• Put stereo on and played with toys when meant to be asleep
• Had juice on the side and cup & spoon (?) in bed (!) after being told not to take drinks into bedroom (as they usually end up on the carpet)
• Answered back about all of the above, rolled eyes a lot, stomped and done a lot of shouting and flouncing

Yes. So, that has been my evening.  Well, two hours of my evening, and to be honest that is just run of the mill at the moment.

So, if anyone local would like a 12 year old girl (I’d like to see her at least a few times a week for a short while), then let me know and we’ll work something out!  Don’t be fooled by the fact that she is polite, gentle, funny, well-mannered and incredibly thoughtful as soon as there is someone else around…

the demon drink

Inappropriate?

My elderly (21 years old) cat has been a very poorly puss this week – in fact I even ended up working from home on Monday because I was so worried that she wouldn’t last the day and that The Girl would come home to find her dead.

She’s way better now btw…but this has hardly any relevance to this post

On Tuesday was my work Christmas lunch, and so it was one of the few chances that our disparate employees manage to get together and go out.  Hence I was in the pub when The Girl called me at about 4.45

The Girl:  I just wanted to ring and let you know that Suki had some water – which I thought was really good news
Me:  it is – it’s brilliant news.  Does she look any better?
The Girl:  just a little bit.  She still wont let me touch her though.
Me:  well, she’s old and obviously in a bit of pain, and feeling sorry for herself – give her time hunny.
The Girl:  Mmmm.  *pause*  Where ARE you?
Me:  In the pub
TG:  Why are you in the pub?
Me:  because it’s good
TG:  I don’t think thast it’s good
Me:  Why not?
TG:  well, you might drink lager, or wine…
Me:  or vodka?
TG:  yes – or vodka…and start behaving inappropriately
Me *absolutely pissing myself*:  You are worried that I’m going to be inappropriate?!
TG:  yes
Me:  Have you ever seen me be inappropriate?
TG:  No
Me:  Do you know what acting inappropriately looks like?
TG:  No
Me:  well, don’t worry your pretty little head darling – I am totally appropriate!

Of course, when I got off the phone to her, I started dancing on the bar and whipped my knickers off.

(The last bit might be a lie)